ZOOKUNGFU

DEFIANTLOVE.com
***
david j. sperling BIO
DRUNK IN PUBLIC
DRUNK IN PUBLIC MESSAGE BOARD
NEWS and REVIEWS
speaking info
media
WHAT'S WRITTEN
SHOP
contact
 
"ANIMALS KICK ASS! -- and now so can you!"
 - Instructor Bill Dang
An animal-based martial art and combat system, designed by renowned instructor, Bill Dang, for the purposes of self-defense, opponent destruction, fitness and most importantly...

"TOTAL AWESOME HARDCORE-NESS".
ZOOKUNGFU & "TOTAL AWESOME HARDCORE-NESS" are trademarked by Bill Dang 2008
 
ZOOKUNGFU has been designed and modeled after the critters of nature, which is not only good for your self esteem, but it makes it very easy to learn for children, adults & oldies too!  These battle steps are ideal for crowded elevators, wildlife lovers, hostage situations, break dancers & awkward moments at the ATM.
Read what people are saying about ZOOKUNGFU
"Why learn an antiquated system from some guy in a strip mall dojo that needs a walker and doesn't even speak English?  I want something with a proven history, of course, but I want it taught by someone who has a fresh take on the world today (and can show me how to get a six pack of brick wall abs).  With the skills of animals and all the success they've had since the beginning of time, now combined with the dynamic teaching of instructor Bill Dang, ZOOKUNGFU gives you the best of both worlds!  Get rid of the old fuddy duddy ways and get with it--animal style!" 
          - "BAD" Chad Stryker, Los Angeles, CA
"I've tried everything...None of it works.  Then I saw my friend Clark get bit by a snake and I was very impressed how fast that snake moved--so I thought to myself, 'I gotta get me some of THAT!'"
          - Mitch Feltzer, Casper, WY
"Not only is ZOOKUNGFU the easiest system I've ever learned, it's also the most deadly!  This can be attributed to instructor Dang's revolutionary theory of 'HARDCORE-NESS'.  If you spend anytime on the streets, you need ZOOKUNGFU."
        - Dr. Gerard Kozbell, Cape Town, South Africa
"I like to use it on Jeremy in class when he picks his nose."
          - Chloe Rastler, 2nd Grader, Eden Prairie, MN
"Aside from what is witnessed in the natural world, there is nothing like Bill Dang's ZOOKUNGFU.  We would like to add that this is a good thing." 
          -  Martial Arts Today
"There is nothing like this.  I had an MMA career and my record as a cage fighter would have been better that 1-9
if I had discovered Bill Dang's system years ago.  I burn way more calories than I did with PUNCH PRANCING too!"
          -  Chazz Kilpatrick (my weird neighbor)
 
ZOOKUNGFU FAQ
coming soon
Q:  Who is the man behind ZOOKUNGFU?

Q:  Traditional martial arts uses belts to track a students progress, but ZOOKUNGFU uses "BANDS" -- what are "BANDS"?

Q:  Do animals cry?

Q:  What exactly is "TOTAL AWESOME HARDCORE-NESS"? (no...animals are not pussies...only people are...ZOOKUNGFU can help you overcome crying, too)

Q:  How soon will I be able to kill?

Q:  What if I'm fat AND lazy?

Q:  Most other martial arts make you learn their language, am I gonna have to learn to speak crab or badger?

Q:  Can I still eat animals?

Q:  Will this protect me AGAINST animals, or do I still need a gun?

Q:  Why should I choose ZOOKUNGFU over any of the other hundreds of fighting systems? (soul removal vs. heart removal, it works--look at the animal evidence)

Q:  How much does it cost?

Q:  Once I master ZOOKUNGFU can I call myself a cagefighter like everyone else?
(actually, you'll be a TRUE cagefighter, cuz, you know, animals are in cages)

Q:  Will this help me deal with my wife?
ZOOKUNGFU - 16 STEPS
coming soon
BEAR glare
WHALE call
KANGA kick
GORILLA slap
RAM ram
BRONCO buck
DRAGON chop
CRAB grab
BUFFALO fist
GATOR clamp
NARWHAL strike
RHINO butt
SNAKE bite
BADGER blind
HIPPO stomp
ROACH run

ZOOKUNGFU - MEDIA
coming soon

"Why eat animals, when you can learn from them?!"
 - Instructor Bill Dang
 
 
email me:
created & copyrighted by david j. sperling

WARNING:
There is some material on this site that is created & copyrighted by OTHER artists. 
This site receives no fiscal or monetary gain from such material. 
Such material is on display to promote in a free manner such artists & their material. 
See accompanying links to purchase such material when applicable.

ANY UNAUTHORIZED USE OF ANY OF THE MATERIAL ON THIS WEBSITE IS
PROHIBITED BY LAW AND WILL BE ENFORCED ACCORDING TO THE
   ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Enter supporting content here